Amazon Deal of the Day: 75% off winter coats!

Amazon is offering 75% off winter coats as its Deal of the Day today. If you haven't yet picked up ones for your child or yourself for the winter, you may want to check them out!

When someone you love needs help at the holidays

"To learn to give, you have to learn to receive," I was told by a wise nun years ago.

It is the toughest advice I ever had to swallow but one I think I benefit from each day.

I had a baby and a three year old, my husband was out of work, and the Great Recession was in its beginnings. Everyone was scared. And so was I.

This was the year that Christmas came from loved ones - and many secret Santas I'm still grateful for. They blessed us with diapers, clothes, toys for the children. I spent that Christmas day in half tears, devastated by the fact we ourselves couldn't provide things for our family. The Kroger gift card - giving us a week's worth of groceries - drove the point home. Never intended, but our situation was too raw.

I learned my "lesson" that year and despite our financial situation tucked away a few things over the year (clearance summer clothes, etc.), determined not to be empty under the tree. But it took even longer for me to learn the real lesson.

Whatever we have - no matter how little - is a gift from God, and we always have the chance to grace others and share blessings.

Here are some ways we've learned to bless others - and some tips for friends and family who are on the "other side" wanting to help: 

Blessing Others When You're Broke

• Time and talent: I always try to remember that in our church they talk about gifts of not just treasure - but also time and talent. (Note that you'll often hear "treasure" last of these tree!) Gifts of time and talent can make such a difference - whether it's donating time to a charitable organization or making an upcycled gift.
  
  In the last few years, while we try to recover from our financial upset, we have redoubled our efforts to help, whether it's at school, scouts or church. Not only does it provide needed volunteer support, but my children will remember that mom and dad were there! Maybe you can't donate to the Angel Tree, or perhaps you yourself are benefiting from it; instead, can you help wrap gifts or deliver them?
  
  The gift of time is simple too. While I don't do gifts for friends, we do invite them for cookie making - treasured time when everyone is so busy! Or offer to babysit one night for a dear friend.
• Use ExtraBucks wisely. As we don't have a lot of extra money right now, we are very careful in what we can donate. But those ExtraBuck deals can bless others. Now I buy nearly free diapers for our Gabriel Project at church or free foods or medications for the church food pantry. Every bit helps.
• Reach out and ask how you can help. I believe people naturally want to help others but sometimes we need to give them the opportunity. A woman at church knew a family whose home burnt. She certainly couldn't help them in all the ways they needed, so she reached out. And we reached out. A few phone calls later and I had not only clothes for one daughter from us but also clothes for a son and decorations for a Christmas tree I had heard was being donated to the family. 

When Your Family Is Financially Struggling 

• Don't be afraid to ask what they need...and gently encourage them to share. Do the kids need new shoes? Pajamas? Maybe they need diapers (or maybe cloth ones they can reuse?) or gas cards?
  
  Be specific. Saying to let me know if you need anything, or asking what I can do to help may not get you far.
• Help meet emotional needs. While you're not a therapist, even something as simple as movie tickets and an offer to watch the kids for a night can give parents the emotional break from the constant worry of a situation.
• Be practical without feeling"practical." Sure you could buy groceries, but you can also buy a basket of locally made spaghetti sauces, breads and salad dressings (for example) from the winter farmers market or buy a gift certificate to a local produce delivery service. It makes the ordinary - cooking and worrying about feeding the family - feel a bit more decadent.
• Consider gifts of experience instead of stuff for the kids. One year, my mother bought the kids soccer and dance lessons at the parks department instead of toys. She likely even saved money than when she bought stuff, but more importantly, the kids felt a little more "normal" and for once weren't turned down when they asked to do an activity. We've tried to continue this tradition when we could, asking for a drawing class through Girl Scouts, for instance.
• Take the focus, if you can, off money. Invite a family for a popcorn and Christmas movie night at your house, take them to a free or low-cost Christmas event, go caroling or looking at the Christmas lights, or invite the kids out for an afternoon of sledding.
• Remember, while they appreciate any assistance , it's also hard to receive. Being in a position of constant worry is difficult, and it's hard to learn to receive gracefully.

Please help others help their loved ones! Share your tips below.

Our Lady of Guadalupe crafts for kids

The feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe is one of my favorite Catholic traditions I have adopted.

Dating back to 1531 in Mexico,  the celebration marks the appearance of the Virgin Mary to a poor man, Juan Diego, who was later named a saint.

I love this description of the lessons of this event, found on catholic.org:

The first lesson is that God has chosen Mary to lead us to Jesus. ...The second lesson we take from Mary herself. Mary appeared to Juan Diego not as a European madonna but as a beautiful Aztec princess speaking to him in his own Aztec language. If we want to help someone appreciate the gospel we bring, we must appreciate the culture and the mentality in which they live their lives. By understanding them, we can help them to understand and know Christ. 

We began celebrating this tradition in our family five years ago, when my daughter began participating in the church's children's processional. We have since grown that part to include crafts, scout patches and activities to help the children better learn and appreciate this aspect of Catholic faith tradition. 

We have adopted a tradition of creating a commemorative Christmas ornament that is simple for the kids to make. Last year's was a simple paper ornament that included a picture of Our Lady of Guadalupe. This year's will likely be a little more complicated as we have an older group. We are looking at these two options:

The Catholic groups for both Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts also have patches the children can earn for learning more about St. Juan Diego, and the Archdiocese of San Antonio has an Our Lady of Guadalupe Girl Scout patch as well.. All three of these resources offer ideas and activities to help school-age children learn about this aspect of their faith.

What has worked with you when sharing the culture of your faith with your children? Share your ideas and experiences below.

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Getting my Girl Scouts Outdoors

Girl Scouts is adding one new badge for the Brownie, Junior, Cadette, and Senior levels. Girls can take this short survey and help us choose the badge category. This survey runs through Nov. 30, 2014. You can vote as often as you like! The badge topic with the most votes wins!

My baby's staying a baby: That's all I need.

My baby just announced he was getting rid of all his "little books."

"I just need chapter books now," my first grader said.

And my heart took a skip.

What? My baby doesn't read his books anymore?

"No Goldbug?"

"I'm too old for this book."

"No Three Little Jayhawks?" I asked.

"No I love the Jayhawks. I need it."

"No John Deere?"

"I love John Deere!" he said, taking it back.

"And this one. I love this one."

"And I need this one."

It felt a little bit from the scene from The Jerk...




But what all I need? My baby to stay little just a little bit longer.

Olivia: An inspirational character for my fourth-grade girl

As my fourth-grader becomes more advanced in reading, we've struggled with finding appropriate stories for her to read. Finding compelling stories that aren't about monsters, vampires or other scary topics or themes hasn't been an easy task. I have an impressionable girl, and one that's tender at heart. I'd like to preserve that as long as I can, and even in a Christian school, it's tough to find good books in the school library that she can read.

But I've been pleasantly surprised with the discovery of a new author and Nancy Carabio Belanger's Olivia books.

Olivia and the Little Way tells the story of a fifth-grade girl who moves to a new state. As a way with dealing with the nerves of starting a new school, her grandmother gives her a St. Thérèse chaplet and tells her about "The Little Way," that St. Thérèse believed that "you can show your love for God by doing little things for Him with great love."

Olivia learns how to love others through the Little Way, whether it's dealing with mean kids or other grade-school concerns, but she learns that the Little Way is not always easy.

Her grandmother tells her, "You cannot expect to follow the Little Way without some hardship along the way. It is a work in progress. Do not get discouraged...God does not expect perfection; He only wants you to try your best every day." Great advice, not only for Olivia, but for all of us.

I had received this book for a review copy, but in all honesty haven't had much time to peruse it. My daughter has had her nose in this book since it arrived at our home. But I love that her head pops up to share with me a fact about St. Thérèse or Joan of Arc or other strong women that my daughter should look up to as inspiration.


Olivia and the Little Way is a 2009 Catholic Press Association book award winner, children's books. It is also a 2010 recipient of the Catholic Writers Guild Seal of Approval.

The sequel, Olivia's Gift, (which I'm certain will wind up on my daughter's bookshelf!) has received the Catholic Writers Guild seal of Approval and is a 2011 Catholic Press Association book award winner.

Note: This post does include affiliate links for ordering. Thank you for your support of my blog.

Saints for When You're Getting Nothing for Christmas

At bedtime, worries come out. And in a hushed tone, my 6 year old said, "Mom, I don't think I'm getting anything in my stocking. I've been too naughty."

Yes, we've had more than our share of "naughty moments" in the last few weeks. But the awesome thing was, my son was realizing that maybe those moments add up.

I gave him a hug. There is still time to change, I assured him. And even really big saints were naughty - really naughty, far worse than what a 6 year old could do - but changed their minds and turned to God.

Take St. Augustine. Known today as one of the doctors of the Catholic Church and the author of Confessions , a mainstay in university World Civilizations classes, Augustine wasn't always so clean-cut. He hung around with the wrong crowd, and made a series of not-so-great choices. (Not that I'd share this with my first-grader, but his famous prayer was "Grant me chastity and continence, but not yet."

Even St. Francis of Assisi, a beloved saint for my son, wasn't so saintly to begin with. He loved his lavish lifestyle and all it brought. A spiritual crisis and illness ultimately led him to his personal conversion, and a quest to "rebuild my church."





What impresses me about the lives of saints is that, for all of those who were known to lead a Godly life their whole lives, there seem to be just as many who struggled, fell, and yet turned their way to God. And that is what I want my children to know.

And Saints are our friends in Heaven. We can ask them for help, just as we might talk to a loved one who had passed. Last night, we began talking to our saint friends Augustine and Francis, and asked them to help us not be naughty.

Sweet words coming from the mouth of a 6 year old. But I believe, a friendship could lead to great change.