I will never begin to understand God's timing.
I will likely never understand why we went through three years of unemployment and then several years of underemployment. Why we built up debt just trying to stay afloat.
I will likely never understand the rocky last year and a half we have had, dealing with injuries, illness and depression.
But in a small way, we've been blessed.
In recent months, I've slowly began to realize that I need to lean on the Lord. Hard. If Catholic school is a priority for our children's education, we will make it so. If medical bills are a priority, we will make it so. But the combination of the two was deadly. And I leaned. And leaned. I asked God to just show us how.
It's a question I've asked again and again the last six years. I've stumbled, I've fallen. I've hoped.
I even joined on the book launch team for Slaying the Debt Dragon: How One Family Conquered Their Money Monster and Found an Inspired Happily Ever After, in the small hopes of finding that nugget of inspiration that could get us through the coming months.
And somewhere between my readings and prayers, something happened. Something moved.
My husband got his first job interview in more than two years. We'll hopeful that it's the right opportunity, as it would mean better hours and a much shorter commute as winter approaches.
And I got blessed with an unexpected raise. I'm shocked. And grateful. And having to look at our budget (which was still all in my head) in a whole new light.
We could do this.
We could pay our debts off.
We could be free.
I'm hopefully optimistic.